As if I wasn’t missing it enough, I woke to find today is National Iced Tea Day. Which of course I read as National Sweet Tea Day because there just isn’t any comparison and I still have that mindset. Maybe one day I will forget about it but living in the South just doesn’t make it the easiest. Here tea is sweet. If you dare to specifically order unsweet tea you immediately get asked what sweetener packet you want (Sweet & low, equal, etc) because how could anyone drink tea without a kick of sweetness? (even my spell check doesn’t recognize “unsweet”!) So yeah the one thing I have cut out (I didn’t drink soda that much before so not even counting that) is the one thing that seems to consistently tempt or taunt me. All a test of my dedication I guess.
I may be sweet but when it comes to taking care of me, I can be a beast. I’m worth it. Besides when it comes down to it, it really is just flavored water anyway right?
Still. The temptations lurk everywhere.
But the rewards also seem to be appearing. I’ve lost several pounds which didn’t hurt & I dare say I am starting to have a bit more energy back. Could be the change in meds but I have to think that the clean eating has a lot to do with it. I know calories have been reduced (have you tried to eat the same number of calories as a fast food meal in veggies & fruit? it would not be comfortable at all) but also the vitamins are increased and it just seems to feel better.
Still catch myself at times wondering if all this focus on counting grams of sugar & calories, etc is really healthy but I know I will get used to it & at some point I will know what is acceptable & what isn’t. It will come more naturally. Had to laugh at myself when I spilled coffee down my shirt & my first thought wasn’t “Shit” but “Wonder how many calories that was?”. I may be a tad obsessive right now. BUT I know this is for my best & I will not let it get back into dangerous territory. There have been days where I know I haven’t eaten enough & I add food. So it isn’t all about reducing. Focus is on quality and restriction of the parts that are not good for me. Feels good. Strange to do some of the same things that I did in self hate years ago but this time in self love. I don’t even know how to describe how that makes me feel.
Really grateful for so much right now. Second chances & turning bad habits into good ones, in so many ways.