Better Off Alone


Dating in your 30s is VERY different than dating in your 20s.

For one, there are a lot less single people your age & most of the single ones are jaded from past relationships.  None of us are without baggage.  Sure some get lucky & leave their luggage behind, but we all have travel down a few roads & have stories to tell.

We all have made mistakes.  The key is learning from them and keeping them from being disasters.  Thankfully most mistakes you can grow from and sooner or later they don’t even bother to be much more than a memory.

For other people, their past haunts their present in ways that make it impossible to create the futures they desire.  I’m sure they envy the rest of us.

The labels they receive make it hard to be anything more.


In a lot of ways, I feel bad for them .

I embrace my own ability to change and be whoever I want to become with pure gratitude.  A gift I admit I take for granted most days.

I have choices.  My adventure is my own to make.

The choices I make aren’t always in hindsight the best, but occasionally they make me really proud and bring me to a place I like.


Which is why when something doesn’t feel right, I check it out and make my own calls.  Trusting what people say and sometime do is not a strength of mine and at times that works in my favor.  Instincts can be life savers.

Part of what I liked in Human Resources and some of what intrigues me about Law is looking into what makes people who they are.  You build upon your past.  I like getting the facts and understanding people better.

Unless who they really are isn’t who you hoped they were.

People can say so much, but actions speak volumes.  The details drive you to the truth in so many ways.  Signs are everywhere even when people try to tell you they aren’t.

This weekend was a true test for me & thankfully I am no worse than I was before.  A bit shaken and less trusting of the whole online dating thing, but I trust myself more & those who guide me.  Lesson stored away in hopes that it will serve to deter me from ever having to deal with that again.

Decided it is time to step away from the whole dating thing.  Closed up the online profiles and decided to just focus on reconnecting with friends, becoming more of who I want to be, healing from the loss of Mom and of course lots of time on school work that will hopefully lead me where I want to be.   Taking a few steps to ensure my own safety and reminding myself of how lucky I am to have some amazing people around me at this time in my life.

Thought a lot about telling more details, but this is another case of it isn’t really my story to tell.  The convictions and cases speak for themselves and thankfully are public record for me to discover when I needed to but the who & what doesn’t matter.  They do their time daily. 

What I will say is that doing research about anyone who you think may be coming into your life is vital.  There are 3 sides to every story (including the truth which I may never truly know).   Family may be given to you, but the ones you bring into your world should be ones who add positivity, comfort and joy.

Make your own legacy.


3 thoughts on “Better Off Alone

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