Lately a lot of my time has been spent thinking of food.
Planning meals, cooking meals, helping to feed meals. Clean up, shop & do it all again. Trying to keep things interesting yet healthy and within the preferences of the group. Working with what you have and staying within a budget can be a challenge at times. All part of life.
For a big part of my life, I avoided food. Many reasons some I still battle with, some are distant memories. Even learning to let go and eat for enjoyment and substance, I still wanted the perfect body. Guilt is a frequent mealtime companion, even if most bites shut it up. I don’t struggle like I used to but I still long for that perfect body.
Lately, my perfect body has changed. No longer do I wish I still fit into a size 6. Watching my mom’s body shrink away has given me a new appreciation for every bite I take and every stubborn pound I wear. Health matters more than being a vision in a photograph.
Thankfully I can eat pretty much what I want, when I want. I am physically able to walk to a fridge and open it whenever I like. Spoons aren’t too heavy for me to manipulate. A box of juice is easy to finish in one sitting. There is food in my pantry to choose from.
For these things I am very thankful.
On the way home from class, I stopped and had a chocolate milkshake in celebration of all that I am thankful for. Not a single guilty thought allowed. I could almost swear it tasted better that way.