One day I may learn to sleep a normal schedule again.
One day I may figure out what I’m really looking for in life. Lately I’m just not sure. On some levels things seem to be falling apart. Still others pieces are potentially better than ever.
One thing that is becoming increasingly clear is life is short. Every moment wasted is gone forever. You learn from it, live it for what it is & step forward into the next one. I’m figuring out people can be incredibly self centered. Which isn’t always a bad thing. If we don’t love ourselves, why should anyone else. Problems arise when you start to love someone & realize that its going to mean taking into consideration everything from a whole new perspective. Goals may change but others achieved. Maybe no matter how much we would like we will never reach all we strive for. Perhaps a few of the opportunities are really just test to see how devoted we are or to see how strong we are.
I know the more I take time out to discover my true self, the less tolerant I’ve become of the petty drama, stress & lack of simple kindness. Things that seemed normal before now just annoy me. I notice how shallow people can be. How shallow I can be.
This is a rare moment in time where little things delight. A conversation over a pancake at a greasy dinner can thrill more than a candlelight dinner where you need wine to calm the awkward nerves or be on some best behavior. Reality is just that real. Perception may be everything but reality last.
Feeling drawn more and more to the ocean and its calm serenity. The secrets of its depths more priceless than any name brand or trend. Just the timeless persistence of the sand and salty waves. They were there before my life and after I’m gone they will continue on. Doesn’t matter how much or little we have the shore welcomes all. The rays of the sun caress and warm the skin, be it baby new, centurian old or anywhere in between. The white caps rush up to out toes no matter the number, color or condition they are in. Pure acceptance as is. No complaints or trying to change. To fear of being left behind.