For once I am getting sleep. Decent nightly sleep. Some nights its the ambien, some times I down a klonapin, but every night sleep. You’d think it would all be better. Some how it all just leaves me feeling even more restless than before.
As if now I have the physical recharge now I need more.
Just not quite sure what exactly.
Some of it is loneliness. I freely admit it would be nice to have someone to vent to about my day or dream with about something new. Distractions. Reminder that there is more that what is.
Part of it is just adjusting to life with one less bird around here. The snuggly one is certainly missed with his sweet spirit. Bijou isn’t the only one who is feeling the void left behind.
Also people are just finding the newest of ways to amaze me.
From the insanity on resumes, to the unique situations that arise each day, to the intrusions that make my blood boil & wonder where common decency went.
Like yesterday. I found a business card on my car. Part of me thought I heard someone at the door when I was showering, but I wasn’t expecting anyone. No solicitors wanted, so I didn’t stress. Turns out it must have been the insurance agent. WTF? I checked rates ONLINE with one company to see if I would save in switching. They have emailed. Mailed & now trespassed. I certainly didn’t invite their ass. Didn’t even respond to any of the messages prior. At what point does the sales pitch cross the line?
Feels like a lot of personal & business lines cross lately.
Maybe they always have.
Still I feel at one point in life there was a separation.
Now not so much.
Guess everyone wants something. Be it a paycheck or a sale.
So tonight I hibernate. After yesterdays non-stop going, I am ready for a chill night. Just me some wine & maybe an ice cream dinner…
went looking for pumpkin ice cream but found something I didn’t really expect!
and of course as many laughs as I can slam into the night!